BA 200 University of Illinois Rewriting a Poorly Written Persuasive Message Letter

– Rewrite appropriately, consider …

a. What content and structures need/do not need to be in this letter?

b. Is the letter format correct for a business persuasive message letter?

c. Is information in the proper location? Set-up as a proper business letter with all components.

d. Is the Opening, Body and Closing content developed properly?

e. Is the Opening, Body and Closing content presented effectively?

f. Create an appropriate header (letterhead) and footers (as needed)

Ms. Nancy Ashley,Director

Human Resources DepartmentSoftware Enterprises, Inc.

268 Redmond Avenue

Bellevue, WA 98420

Dear Ms. Nancy Ashley,

I’m looking for an internship position that will earn me three units of credit. Perhaps I could fill in foremployees who are taking vacations or who might be released for training at Software Enterprises, Inc.

I have taken a number of courses, and now I really need some experience, I’m a college senior at EdmondsCollege and I have communication and computer skills, I know Word and Excel, and I’ve had training in letterand report writing. Are these skills that might be useful in one of your departments? Although I can’t work inthe mornings because that’s when I take classes, I am available in the afternoons but I couldn’t give you morethan 15 hours a week. I need to do this during the next 14 weeks if possible.

I realize that equipment and desk space at your company may not be available for an intern. You may also beworried about insurance, but don’t give it a thought. Our college has liability insurance for all interns. I’msending a copy of my resume for you to see.

Please let me know about the possibility for an internship.

Sincerely,

(Your Name, Class Time)